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Forum "Korrekturlesen" - cartoon
cartoon < Korrekturlesen < Englisch < Sprachen < Vorhilfe
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cartoon: berichtigung
Status: (Frage) beantwortet Status 
Datum: 21:14 Do 21.06.2007
Autor: anfaenger_

Aufgabe
ich hatte nen cartoon und sollte den analysieren... wär nett, wenn sich den text mal jemand durch lesen könnte ob der so okay ist! danke




The cartoon, published in The New Yorker on the 9 of July in 2001, shows a woman talking to a child. On the left site and in the background of the cartoon you can see paintings, so it suggests that the scene is set in a museum. Under the cartoon you can read: “ Instead of ‘It sucks’ you could say, ‘it doesn’t speak to me.’”
With this cartoon the author wants to criticize two main things. The first one is the obvious desinterest of the youth in paintings and art. With the sentence “it sucks” the author wants to show what the adolescence think about art. For them it’s too boring to concern onself with the topic of art. It’s very seldom that they go into a museum or and institution comparable to it, so it’s a logical consequence that they aren’t interestet in such things. But, in my eyes, the desinterst is not only a fault of the youth, if theire parents life a live without a special interest in art and visits in artwork installations are just rare moments it’s an aftereffect that the children also decline every kind of art. With this previous history it’s a normal development that most of the children have no idea about art.
The second point the author wants to mention is the brutalisation of the language. Meanwhile four-letter words are a normal part of our language, and it’s not only the youth who use them. The usage of such words goes through all social levels, through all agegroups and nobody really cares if anybody speak like this. If this process becomes a continuing trend nobody needs to wonder if someday we all speak like “it sucks”.
In my oponion the author gives a good a example how the youth speak and think. We have to know that these youth is the next generation of adults and what if they don’t change? They will speak like this even in twenty years.
On the other site every generation had have his own slang and were also not intersted in arts. I think it’s a normal process in growing-up that the youth refuses the wishes and views of the adults.



        
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cartoon: Mitteilung
Status: (Mitteilung) Reaktion unnötig Status 
Datum: 22:54 Do 21.06.2007
Autor: espritgirl

Hey du *winke*

Habe den Cartoon gerade nur mal kurz überflogen - gefällt mir, was du geschrieben hast ;-)

Ich gucke morgen mal in Ruhe drüber, okay?!

Wenn jemand anders die Frage beantworten möchte, dann nur zu ;-)

Ansonsten bis morgen Mittag.

Liebe Grüße,

Sarah :-)

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cartoon: 1. Korrektur
Status: (Antwort) fertig Status 
Datum: 11:41 Fr 22.06.2007
Autor: espritgirl

Hey anfaenger [winken],

die wenigen Fehler die ich gefunden habe sind in rot markiert, damit du diese direkt siehst ;-)


> The cartoon, published in The New Yorker on the 9 th of July
> in 2001, shows a woman talking to a child. On the left site
> and in the background of the cartoon you can see paintings,
> so it suggests that the scene is set in a museum. Under the
> cartoon you can read: “ Instead of ‘It sucks’ you could
> say, ‘it doesn’t speak to me.’”
>  With this cartoon the author wants to criticize two main
> things. The first one is the obvious desinterest  disinterest of the
> youth in paintings and art. With the sentence “it sucks”
> the author wants to show what the adolescence think about
> art. For them it’s it is (keine Kurzform in Texten) too boring to concern onself with the
> topic of art. It’s it is  very seldom that they go into a museum
> or and institution comparable to it, so it’s it is a logical
> consequence that they aren’t are not interestet interested in such things.
> But, in my eyes kann man diese Redewendung so im Englischen sagen? Ich weiß es nicht, habe es auch noch nicht gehört. Vielleicht kannst du ja stattdessen "In my opinion" schreiben? Aber wenn du sicher weißt, dass das geht, dann lass das so!, the desinterst disinterest is not only a fault of the
> youth, if theire parents life a live without a special
> interest in art and visits in artwork installations besser: and visiting artwork facilities are
> just rare moments it’s it is an aftereffect that the children
> also decline every kind of art. With this previous history
> it’s it is a normal development that most of the children have no
> idea about art.
>  The second point the author wants to mention is the
> brutalisation of the language. Meanwhile four-letter words
> are a normal part of our language, and it’s (it is) not only the
> youth who use them. The usage of such words goes through
> all social levels, through all agegroups and nobody really
> cares if anybody speaks like this. If this process becomes a
> continuing trend nobody needs to wonder if someday we all
> speak like “it sucks”.
>  In my oponion opinion the author gives a good a example how the
> youth speak and think. We have to know that these youth is
> the next generation of adults and what if they don’t will not
> change? They will speak like this even in twenty years.
>  On the other site besser vll handevery generation had have his own slang
> and were also not intersted in arts. I think it’s (it is) a normal
> process in growing-up that the youth refuses the wishes and
> views of the adults.

Immer daran denken, dass man im schriftlichen (ausgenommen Tagebucheinträge) keine Kurzformen benutzt.

Ansonsten war es wirklich okay, waren ja nur Kleinigkeiten.

Vielleicht kann ja noch jemand eine zweite Korrektur lesen?!


Liebe Grüße,

Sarah :-)

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cartoon: Antwort
Status: (Antwort) fertig Status 
Datum: 23:58 Fr 22.06.2007
Autor: Teufel

Hi! habe nichts gefunden, außer dass du alle 'sites' durch 'sides' ersetzen solltest!

Und 'on the other hand' wäre nicht nur besser als 'on the other side', sondern ich würde es sogar als pflicht ansehend as zu ersetzen ;) 'on the other side' heißt nämlich 'jenseits' (on the other side of the mountains etc.).

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cartoon: Antwort
Status: (Antwort) fertig Status 
Datum: 23:17 Sa 23.06.2007
Autor: sancho1980


> The cartoon, published in The New Yorker on the 9 of July
> in 2001, shows a woman talking to a child. On the left site
> and in the background of the cartoon you can see paintings,
> so it suggests suggesting that the scene is set in a museum. Under the
> cartoon you can readit says: “ Instead of ‘It sucks’ you could
> say, ‘it doesn’t speak to me.’”
>  With this cartoon the author wants to criticize two main
> things. The first one is the obvious desinterestlack of interest of the
> youthyoungsters in paintings and art in general. With the sentence “it sucks”
> the author wants to show what the adolescence young think about
> art. For them it’sart is too boring to concern onself with the
> topic of art
. It’s very seldomrare that they go into a museum
> or and institution comparable to it
to see them go to the museum or the likes of it, so it’s a logical
> consequence that they aren’t interested in such things.
> But, in my eyesview, thethis desinterstlack of interest is not only a their fault of the
> youth,
. If theiretheir parents lifelive a livelife without a special
> interest in art and visits in artwork installations are
> just rare moments
to the museum it’s an aftereffecta logical consequence that thetheir children
> also,too, decline every kind oflack any interest in art. With this previous historyAgainst this background
> it’s a normal development that most of the children have no
> idea about what art is all about.
>  The second point the author wants to mentionmake is the
> brutalisation of the language
that language is becoming ever more vulgar. Meanwhile Four-letter words
> are already a normal part of our language, and it’s not only the
> youthyoung who use them. The usageuse of such words goes through
>
can be seen at all social levels and throughat all groups of age all agegroups and nobody really
> cares if anybodysomeone speaks like this. If this process becomes a
> continuing trend nobody needs to wonderbe surprised if somedayone day we're all saying all
> speak like
“it sucks”.
>  In my opinion the author gives a good a example ofhow the
> youthyoung speak and think. We have to knowbe aware that these youthyoung people iswill be
> the next generation of adults and what if they don’t
> change? They will speak like this even in twenty years time.
>  On the other sitehand every generation of adults had have his own slang
> and were also not intersted in arts
their own slang in their time and wasn't interested in art. I think it’s a normal
> process inpart of growing-up that the youthyoung refuses the wishes and
> views of the adults
resist the will of their parents.
>  
>  

Stilistisch hätte ich noch ein paar Sachen zu bemängeln, aber ich gehe davon aus, dass du noch in der Schule bist. Auch hängt es davon ab welche Klasse du bist. Ich weiß ich wär ein strenger Lehrer geworden, also nimm's dir nicht so sehr zu Herzen. :-)

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